Five minutes before these photos were taken, I was about to pull out my hair. Maile wanted me to hold her. We were hiking up quite the incline, nearing the tallest point of the dunes at Great Sand Dunes National Park. She was making her displeasure with waking up in the hiking pack, on her dada's back, known by sobbing "Mama hoooold you, Mama hoooooold you ..." We were all sweaty and tired, and I felt a flash of angry words pop up into the back of my throat. Thankfully, I caught them there, and they never escaped my lips ...
I hope you know what I'm talking about.
And then, we were there. It didn't quite seem so much like the top of the world, as it did the top of some strange and distant land.
She picked up a handful of sand and let it go, grain by grain, flowing seamlessly into the wind that created the great dunes.
In that moment, even though I captured it on camera, I didn't know quite what to do. My heart stopped in my chest, and I just stared at her, wanting to scoop her up like the sand that so fascinated her, and never let her go. She was spellbound, yet so free. And that stitch in time, as all like it, made the frustrating five minutes before so worth it. It really did.
Ahh, yes. How well I know that feeling. Kids test our sinful nature more than anything else, don't they? Thankful for a God full of grace and for those teachable moments. Thanks for your words, sweet friend. xo
ReplyDeleteI couldn't have said it better myself. Grace, grace, grace, grace, grace, grace, grace. I don't think I've ever been so familiar with that word as through parenting!
DeleteI can never get mad at my son for long too. Love these photos of her, she seems to be fully mesmerised by the sand slipping beneath her little fingers...
ReplyDeleteIt's hard for me to stay mad, too. I have to admit, though, that sometimes those little flashes of anger scare me -- and almost always fill me with guilt. I'm a work in progress!
DeleteAh yes my friend, how I have been there so many times before. Unfortunately, there have been times I have let those angry words come out...and they sting me as much as they sting Ellie. I am a work in progress, but wonderful posts like these by my amazing friends encourage me to keep trying, and to pray for patience and humility, and to let my child be a child....fits and all!
ReplyDeletexoxoxo
Thank you for the sweet reminder my wonderful friend!
♥ Kyna
Many too many times I also let those angry words slip past my lips. I hate those days I feel like I'm trying so hard to make up a "snap" to her. You said it so well -- let a child be a child!
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